How to start a fight with your wife?

1. In the supermarket, I suggested my wife to get a box of beer for 20 dollars. She said it can’t be and, without even asking, bought herself a face cream for 65 dollars. I told her she would look better with the box of beer than with that cream… And so it begun…


2. Few days ago, I asked my wife where does she wants to go for our anniversary. She said:
“Somewhere where I haven’t been yet”. I suggested to go to the kitchen. And so it begun…


3. While watching football my wife sit next to me and asked:
“Whats on TV?”
“Dust” – I replied. And so it begun…


4. I asked my wife few days ago does she have any special wish for her birthday gift. She said:
“I want something, something red that goes from 0 to 100 in 3 seconds.”
I bought her a red weighing scale. And so it begun…


5. My wife looked in the mirror and she was unsatisfied from what she saw. She said:
“I feel terrible: I have excess of weight and dark circles. Please tell me something good and positive!”
I told her that she has an excellent vision. And so it begun…


6. We went together with my wife on her graduation anniversary. One of the people there was constantly drinking. I asked my wife if she knows him.
“Of course” – she said, “We dated for a long time and when we broke up he started drinking and hasn’t stopped yet.”
I replied: “Who would have said that he would celebrate this long?!”
And so it begun…